Pastor’s Blog

“Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.”

- 1 Peter 3:7 (NKJV)

Without question, we can surmise from PeterGÇÖs admonition to husbands in-áthis text,-áthat it is possible for our prayers to be hindered, and that we ourselves could be the source of the hindrance. Knowing this, the question then becomes,-áGÇ£Why would anyone want to be the source of their own hindrance to their prayers?GÇ¥ The fact of the matter is that no one sets out to-áintentionally-ábecome a hindrance to their own prayers. Most of the time, we do what we do out of ignorance.-á

The Bible tells-áus that people are destroyed-áfrom a-álack of knowledge (Hosea 4:6).-áNot knowing that the things we do can become a hindrance to our prayers will cause us to continue doing those things.-á On the other hand, sometimes, even knowing the right thing to do does not guarantee that we will do the right thing (Romans 7:15). Fortunately, Peter gives us several pointers as to how we can avoid becoming a hindrance to our own prayers so that we can eliminate the excuse of not knowing what to do.

First he says, GÇ£Husbands, likewise, dwell with them (our wives) with understanding.GÇ¥ The Amplified version of the Bible gives this rendition of the same phrase: In the same way, you married men should live considerately with [your wives] having an intelligent recognition of the [marriage relation]…

PeterGÇÖs message is simple GÇô DonGÇÖt take the marriage relationship for granted. You are no longer casual acquaintances but parties to a covenant that has been sealed by the Holy Spirit. To dwell with understanding requires-áthat we interact with our spouses-áwith a measure of sensitivity that is based on knowledge.

Just as you know yourself better than anyone knows you, in the same way, you ought to know your spouse better than anyone else knows her because, now, you are Gǣno longer two but one fleshGǪGǥ (Matt. 19:6). Your knowledge of your spouse ought to have the same depth and intimacy as your knowledge of yourself because you have become one. You know more than anyone else what floats your boat, what upsets you, what makes you happy, what gives you joy, and what causes you to become anxious, and what gives you peace. So also you should know these things about your spouse and take them into consideration as you live with her. Dwelling with your wife with understanding is a matter of taking the time to make the things that matter to your wife, matter to you.

Bob had just flown in to town for a speaking engagement. His flight arrived on time, and it didn’t take long for him to pick up his bags from the baggage claim area. Unfortunately, the person who was supposed to be picking him up was not there - or so he thought. He paced back and forth impatiently in front of a quiet old man for almost an hour. Finally, on the verge of losing it, he noticed the quiet old man approaching him with a puzzled look on his face looking down at a photo in his hand and then up at Bob. “Is this you?” the man asked, showing him a picture. Indeed it was a picture of Bob that must have been at least ten years old. Bob’s secretary had sent his hosts the wrong picture of him. In this picture Bob was wearing an afro and looked nothing like the clean, short-back-and-sides haircut he was currently wearing.

This sad scenario plays itself out everyday across the globe. The Lord has carefully painted a picture of the church in the Bible. What we should look like, how we should walk, talk, think, and act has all been carefully laid out for us in the Bible. We have done a good job at preaching the gospel and telling the world what we look like, yet when they come looking for us so that they can receive help, they cannot find us, because we do not look anything like the picture that has been painted by the Lord, and preached about by us.

In every city, town, and village, Christians are living a double life and undermining their credibility in the world. When they are among other believers, they play the religious game, and when they are among unbelievers they act like unbelievers, throwing all caution to the wind and creating more confusion to a lost and dying world. When we put out mixed signals not only is our reputation tarnished, we also tarnish the reputation of the Lord who views this as profaning his holy name (Ezekiel. 36:20), and it grieves him.

The apostle Paul has this admonition for us: “Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption (Eph. 4:30).” Because his seal is on us the world looks at us and knows we are his. You may ask: How is it that we grieve the Lord? Whenever we cause the world to doubt our identity as children of God by our actions, we grieve him. Bitterness, rage, anger, slander, unwholesome talk, and every form of malice (Eph. 4:31), are all pictures that contradict the picture that God has painted of us in the Bible.

The children of Israel acted in despicable ways and grieved the Lord. He disciplined them as he does those he loves (Prov. 3:12) by causing them to be captured and sent into exile in Babylon. Unfortunately, the world does not understand the Lord’s discipline and their interpretation is that God does not care. The surrounding nations said, “These are the Lord’s people, and yet they had to leave his land.” We cannot allow the world to continue to make wrong judgments on the Lord because of our actions.

My prayer is that as children of God, our desire would be to bring him honor and glory in our actions. Make the picture that God has painted of us in the Bible match the picture that the world sees of us in our everyday life. Heed these words of Job and live:

“God is mighty, but does not despise men; he is mighty, and firm in his purpose. He does not keep the wicked alive but gives the afflicted their rights. He does not take his eyes off the righteous; he enthrones them with kings and exalts them forever. But if men are bound in chains, held fast by cords of affliction, he tells them what they have done– that they have sinned arrogantly. He makes them listen to correction and commands them to repent of their evil. If they obey and serve him, they will spend the rest of their days in prosperity and their years in contentment. But if they do not listen, they will perish by the sword and die without knowledge. “The godless in heart harbor resentment; even when he fetters them, they do not cry for help. They die in their youth, among male prostitutes of the shrines. But those who suffer he delivers in their suffering; he speaks to them in their affliction. “He is wooing you from the jaws of distress to a spacious place free from restriction, to the comfort of your table laden with choice food.
Job 36:5-16

The story of the rich young ruler found in Mark 10:17-22 is a very fascinating one. On the surface, he appeared to have everything. However, deep down he still felt a sense of not quite having arrived. He approached Jesus and wanted to know what he should do to inherit eternal life since he had done everything according to the law and had kept all the commandments since his youth. Jesus’ response to him was pointed and full of discernment. “One thing you lack: Go your way, sell whatever you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, take up the cross, and follow Me.”(Mark 10:21)

Like the young ruler, many who profess faith in Jesus have done everything they have been asked and walk in “obedience” daily. However, under the Jesus microscope, there still is one thing lacking. I don’t know what that “one thing” is for you, but this much I know, if you would approach Jesus with an open heart like the young ruler, he will let you know exactly what you lack. The question is: Do you really want to know whats lacking in your life right now? Or maybe you already know but like the young ruler you are experiencing great sorrow at the thought of making the change.

The young ruler knew who Jesus was, thats why he came to him in the first place. Like the ruler, many of us know Jesus and often turn to him for guidance. Yet, when he offers us his truth, and shows us the way, we do not do as he asks. The cross has never been a pretty picture, but Jesus still asks us to take it up and follow him. One thing is certain, when it comes to life, Jesus does not make suggestions. His are commands that need to be heeded to. In Luke 6:46-49, Jesus likens the one who calls him Lord but does not do as he says, to the foolish man who built his house on the ground without a foundation. When the torrents came, his house collapsed and was completely destroyed.

Be encouraged in the Lord for he did not come to bring a yoke of bondage, rather he came that you might have life, and that more abundantly (John 10:10). Hear his invitation today, do as he says, and enter his rest: “Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matt. 11:29-30)